IT'S CALLED MATURITY......I THINK!

So yesterday I took Natalie to have a pedicure. I had won a free pedicure gift certificate and I let her use it at Spectra Day Spa (maybe if someone from there reads this they will pay for advertising). While standing at the counter checking out we picked up a price list and were looking over it when Natalie asked the dreaded question...."Why would a lady wax her chin?". A tear came to my eye as I thought to myself.....my baby is growing up and it must be time for the talk!

Now this is not just any ole talk. We already did the birds and the bees, the monthly gift, and the don't do drugs talk. No, this is the dreaded.......YOUR BODY WILL TURN AGAINST YOU talk. I have dreaded this one and their Daddy will be NO HELP AT ALL. I guess I should get my thoughts together before I sit the girls down for this somber and devastating news.

1. When you have children......you will lose brain cells. You will no longer be as smart as you once were. Just ask the kids, they will tell you how you don't know anything.

2. Eventually you will be able to save money on bras. After breastfeeding 3 kids, I was able to start wearing tube socks instead and they come in a multi pack for around $10.

3. Good news.....you will get rid of that face acne but the the bad news is it will just move around to your back and sometimes your backside depending on how sweaty you have been.

4. That brings me to being sweaty. The temperature will never suit you. You will be hot one minute and before you can sit down from changing the thermostat you will be cold then you will go right back to hot as soon as you change it again. I personally think this is nature cruel way to get us to exercise.

5. Exercise! Now I have a firm stance on this one. I am against it. People will tell you to do this but I stand by the good book. 1 Timothy 4:8 tells us that exercise profiteth little.

6. If I may use a catch phrase from Diamond Dave the Hillbilly Ninja, "don't be waxing things that don't need waxing". Well this does not ring true for a lady. You will have hairs growing from places they got no use growing from. And yes honey, your chin will be one of those places. Now if you wish to be She-Ra, princess of all body hair and you decide to wax unseen places, I suggest you first read http://justmejulie.wordpress.com/2009/12/29/funny-waxing-story/

7. Find yourself 2 really good friends, one older than you and one younger than you who will take the solemn vow to pluck those hairs from your face when you are too old to do it yourself or if you find yourself in a coma and can't perform your own duties. Now you must return the favor to them. Never ask your husband to do this.....that's just wrong! Why 2 friends you ask? Well if one of them passes on first you still have someone to fall back on. Works the same for them. Don't judge!!

I know there is more I could tell them but I am sure they will be in tears by this point crying out, "WHY??" Physical maturity is inevitable. I personally think it is Proof that God has a sense of Humor.

While telling them all these things is necessary I can't forget my duty as a Christian Mother to make sure they also know about Spiritual Maturity. Growing old is guaranteed but growing spiritually is a choice. I must not skip over the last part of the verse in 1 Timothy 4:8 which reads..."but godliness is profitable unto all things having a promise of the life that now is and for the life to come."

Am I growing spiritually? This would be the first place I should start. My children will know whether I am or not. I should be their example. Thinking back to when you were a babe in Christ......you were so on fire for God. Has that fire faded? Think about how often you prayed........when was the last time you prayed? You couldn't wait to read your bible........when was the last time you even pick it up?   If we don't see a lot of progress then we may be Christians but still wearing diapers.

Ahhhh diapers....I guess I will cover that subject next time.